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That person went out to inspect a new room for renting just now.
The front door closed.
That person previously told me that he remembers when the person’s father left.
That person probably saw his father off at that time.
It’s tough to be left behind.
I knew it from the beginning, to me.
When did I know that? it was long, long ago.
It’s probably from the time I met the person.
I knew deep down in my memories that someday it would be like this.
In that moment, this person is always there by my side, unwaveringly, without a doubt.
I always knew it, deep within my heart, in the distant memories of the future.
But at that time, whenever those memories resurfaced, I would negate them with a “It can’t be, right?”
I entered into a relationship with him, knowing it would be like this.
I think I’ve cherished each moment as a precious memory since I knew it from the beginning.
Did I not consider that doing so would eventually cause my own suffering back then?
Whether I thought about it or not, I knew I had no choice but to do it, so there’s nothing to be done about it.
We have done various things together, thought together, and it has been about 30 years, I suppose.
It has been about 20 years since we started living together, I suppose.
I don’t want to count the days anymore, so I’m not sure.
Every time I move even just a little in my daily life, that memory sticks to me wherever I go, no matter what I do, and it keeps coming back to me. It’s so bothersome and I can’t help but not want to do anything at all.
From now on, he will decide on the room,
actually sort out his belongings,
and the movers will carry them to some distant place.
In the end, he will leave through this entrance,
and just like today, the door will quietly close.
In the past, the door has closed quietly, time and time again.
But eventually, when the time comes, I hear the sound of the key unlocking, and the door is pulled from the outside.
Then, the one and only person allowed to be here returns to the house,
bringing their warmth with them.
(provisional transration)